Humor & awkward moments by Zero Dean, based on weird thoughts & real-life experiences.

Light fixture handyman.

Walk through the men's locker room to the showers. The showers are empty and there is a Latino handyman standing on a step ladder -- with his back to me -- working on a light fixture.

I proceed to make electric zapping noises and then duck into a shower.

I hear him laugh, and when I peek out, he is looking around for the source of the noise.

I say, "You're not going to get electrocuted if I take a shower, are you?"

"If I do, I just scream.", he says.

"Ok."

So I proceeded to take a shower.

I didn't hear any screaming, but he wasn't on the ladder when I got out.

I'm thinking spontaneous combustion.