Humor & awkward moments by Zero Dean, based on weird thoughts & real-life experiences.

Listen carefully

Alright everybody, listen carefully:

I want everyone to crouch down and I'm going to turn off the lights.

Stop it. I know what you're thinking. And seriously, you should be ashamed! This is serious time...

Stop giggling.

Ok, so I want everyone to crouch down and I'll turn off the lights...

And then when the 900th follower on my page walks through the door, I'll turn on the lights and I want everyone to jump up and yell, "SURPRISE!!!"

And you all BETTER be wearing clothes when I do it! I don't want it to be like LAST time.

That was embarrassing.

Ok. So be ready!

10:12 AM : Counter reaches 900

SURPRISE!!!

Wait. How come no one did it with me?

And why are my shoelaces tied together!?

Y'all are a bunch of jokers. That's what you are.